What my Mother has taught me

I think that most of us are life long learners. Many times, we don’t have time to reflect on what we learn from those who have been our teachers thru out our lives.
I have been struggling with slowing down my thoughts and actions. My Mom has taught me this thru her own life. Alzheimer’s presents her with the opportunity to slow all her regular activities to a snail’s pace… walking, eating dressing. She remains calm when she is not rushed into performing any of these daily activities beyond a pace that is comfortable for her. This requires patience, budgeted time and understanding. This has helped me slow myself down and appreciate each activity.
My mother’s loss of herself has helped me realize that I am (by default) the matriarch of the family. The keeper of the memories, traditions, connections and history. Not a role I ever saw myself in, but one that you take on by default. I hope I can do the role justice.
And lastly, I have become my mother’s mother. I know it sounds like a country westerner song, but it seems to be the case. At times, she acknowledges me as as her cousin, her sister (she doesn’t have one), her mother (mostly in my absence) or her nurse. What an honor to hold so many special roles in her mind. I hope I can measure up.
Here I am. I have been in training all my life for this, in one way or another. I only hope I can do her justice, keep her happy and comfortable for whatever life is left.

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